Saturday, April 26, 2014

Late Night Ramblings: 4/26/14, 2:30 AM

This is another one of those nights.

So here I am again, on yet another night when I'm still up well after I probably should have gone to bed. Times like this, I find myself wondering just how I managed to screw up my life badly enough to wind up where I am now. I do know that I've messed up somehow, but I don't know how exactly.

And that last sentence there is what really bothers me. It's good reason for me to think that I haven't learned a damned thing about anything, even when I was trying to learn things. That's a problem on a lot of levels.

It's bad because I've only got a vague idea of what's wrong here. That leads to a lot of other problems, both for me and for other people.

I can't fix what's wrong if I don't really know what that is. Nor can I ask for help, in that case. And I don't really even know how to go about changing any of that.

There are nights like this when it keeps me up, being unproductive. What's worse is that now that I've written about it, I know it's going to have the same effect on some other people I know, and it really shouldn't.

Getting this all sorted in my own head will probably be the best first step, and from the looks of things, I'm going to have a good chance to do that this coming week. Now I just need to get my flabby white ass in gear and do it.

For lack of any other decent options, here I go, I guess.

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