Saturday, March 10, 2012

From The Old Floppies: Issue #01: Review of Sonic SatAM Episode "Sonic Conversion"

There's gonna be a bit more before the jump here, folks, but there's a good reason for that.  I kind of need to explain this before I get into the actual post.

As some of you might know, I'm something of a fan of SEGA's Sonic the Hedgehog franchise, especially the cartoon series, though my opinions on each of the four does vary.  About ten years ago, when the franchise was having its tenth anniversary, I was contacted by an old AOL contact and fellow Sonic fan, who had gotten a group together to build a fan site to celebrate the event.  This fellow, Alex Weitzman, if I recall his name correctly, asked me if I wanted to contribute to said site in some way, as I had some fan fiction that could have gone up.  There was also to be a section for fan reviews of various episodes of the Saturday Morning cartoon series.  Since I had a few episodes recorded to VHS available, I volunteered to do reviews of those episodes as well.

What follows below the jump is the first of two such reviews I have ready access to, for the episode entitled "Sonic Conversion".  Originally written in fall or winter of 2001, at a time when I was still an active part of the Mystery Science Theater fan community, the overall review series takes its title from my self-insertion fan series based on MST.

Be warned, though, at the time, I was only just beginning to really develop as a writer, so expect the spelling to be a little off in a few places and the attempts at humor to be markedly less than stellar overall.

With that, we've got review sign, folks!  Get your snacks and beverages now and prepare to laugh yourselves silly for all the wrong reasons!


    J. Michael Shearer’s Theater Reviews the Saturday morning Cartoon Show                 “Sonic the Hedgehog”

Episode Title: Sonic Conversion
Original Airdate:Fall 1993
Review Number: 15

                Character List

Sonic the Hedgehog: Title character
Sally: Princess of the planet, Sonic’s main squeeze
Tails: Sonic’s sidekick
Bunnie: One of Sonic’s friends and teammates
Rotor: The mechanic on Sonic’s team
Antione (AKA the Grand Duke of Knob): Another of Sonic’s teammates, although not nececarily a friend, per se
Dulcy: A female dragon used as much for comic relief as plot advancement
Uncle Chuck: Sonic’s roboticized uncle who becomes a spy for Sonic’s resistance team
Nichole: Sally’s handheld Artificial Intelegence device.
Robotnik (AKA Captain Schnook, Beldar Conehead): The main villain of the show
Snively (AKA Mister Smeg, Needlenose, Mr. Pointy Nose): Robotnik’s lackey and supposedly his nephue

                The Review

    Well, once again Captain Schnook and Mister Smeg have come up with a plan to catch Sonic, destroy the resistance, and then take over the world and destroy it, too.  This time, it takes the form of an oversized, remote controlled jet called the “Shriekbot.”  Sonic and Sally uncover it on an excursion through Robotropolis’s sewers.  What the purpose of this excursion is, exactly, was never made quite clear.  But there they are, crawling out of a sewer port and into the hangar with the Shriekbot.  Why they feel compelled to shout at one another, I’m not sure.  One would think they’d be likely to get noticed.
    Anywho, they find Sonic’s roboticized Uncle Chuck.  As Sonic aproaches to do something about it, guess what happens?  He gets noticed.  Mr. Smeg points Sonic out to Capt. Schnook, who flips on the phazers on the new thingamajigger he’s built and takes a shot at Sonic.  Direct miss, of course.  So what does Sonic do?  He realizes that he’s likely to get his hinder kicked if he stays there, so he literally picks up Sally, and runs off.  Once Sonic and Sally get outside, they realize that Robotnik is giving chase with his radio controlled jet.  Sally pulls a Power Ring and gives it to Sonic, who immediately goes to Mach 1 and causes a vaccuum that crashes Capt. Schnook’s little toy.
    Once Sonic and Sally get back to Knothole, we find them in Rotor’s hut, preparing to deroboticize Bunnie.  It works, of course, but how long will the effects last?  How long will the deroboticizer itself last, for that matter?  And who will they use it on before they find out?
    Sonic goes to the Ring Pond with Tails to grab a Power Ring.  Sally shows up to tell Sonic not to go to the big city for his dear uncle untill they know if the deroboticizer’s effects are permanent.  Sonic claims to have a headache as he heads off to retrieve Chuck.  Then we get a commercial break.
    When the break ends, Sonic’s made Robotropolis and Uncle Chuck’s factory.  After handing Cuck a Power Ring, Sonic asks if Chuck’s in his own body.  Which isn’t as silly as it seems, all things considered.
    When Sonic and Chuck get back to Knothole, things start going wrong almost immediately.  Chuck gets in the deroboticizer, and it goes kaput as soon as Sally turns it on.  Chuck reverts to his robotic minion programming and informs Sonic and gang that he must detain them by order of Robotnik.  Then he claims that resistance is futile and everyone will be assimilated.  Or was that the Borg from -Star Trek: The Next Generation-?  Sometimes I get the two confused.
    Nicole tells Sally that the only thing that can fix the *deroboticizer* is a part from the *roboticizer*.  Funny how things like that work sometimes, eh?  Rotor suggests that they try to find a way to make the deroboticizer work without parts from the roboticizer.  Usually, I’m more optimistic about things, but here’s something where I gotta say that I just don’t think it’s gonna happen.
    Once the deroboticizer is fixed, Uncle Chuck is normal again, at least for the time being.  He runs around doing things with Sonic and the gang.  Then we have a pleasnt moment with Sally and Bunnie.  Apparently, static buildup gets the better of Bunnie and she reverts to her more familiar form.  Sally reacts to the quick change like Bunnie had just drooled all over herself.  Then the ladies remember Uncle Chuck.  Yes, he’s going to turn back into a robotic drone.
    After our little static-charged moment with Sally and Bunnie, we find Tails bringing someone a big ol’ sub sandwitch.  He goes into Rotor’s hut, trips on a loose floor tile, and gives Antione a perfect chance to once again demonstrate why he’s the Grand Duke of Knob.  Then Chuck has his own static buildup problem and reverts back to being the good little drone he was when this all started.  Chuck extends some slot-style screwdriver heads from his fingers and prepairs to assaul Tails and the Grand Duke.  Then we get another commertial break.  Dong!
    After the break, Chuck runs off with Ant and Tails.  Sally and Bunnie get Dulcy and procede to give chase.  Dulcy rams her head through the top of the screen and then follows Sallys request to go back to the village for Sonic.  While we wait for our hero, Chuck mixes up a batch of mega muck.
    Back at the Ring Pool, Sonic appears to be the same height standing as Sally is kneeling as they wait for a Ring to appear.  Then Sally stands up, and wham, she’s the same height as Sonic that way, too.  Wierd, huh?  Once one does, Sonic goes dashing off, right into the rather large puddle of muck Chuck’s made for him.  I did something similar once.  Fortunately, someone was with me to pull me out.  Chuck runs off with Tails and the Grand Duke again.  Dulcy, Sally, and Bunny show up to rescue Sonic and succede after a less than perfect landing.
    Sonic again goes zipping off to save Tails and Ant.  When they all catch up with each other again, Sonic manages to *finally* free Chuck from being a drone, athough he’s still got the robotic body.
    Once all the details are worked out, Chuck and Sonic decide to play a quick game of chirades with some bots that come for Sonic, Tails, and Antione.  One of the details is, of course, that Chuck will be a spy and parts thief.
    Apparently, the chirades game was deemed worthwhile only as a homage to Dan Quale’s family values system, however, as Captain Schnook sends out the RC jet again.  Sonic promptly trashes it again, this time for good.  Captain Schnook beats up Mister Smeg.
    Back at Knothole, everyone execept Sonic and Tails is cleaning up after the trouble with Chuck.  But then, Sonic’s got every reason not to be, seeing how as he had a big hand in the mess and is feeling down about it.  Tails is comiserating with Sonic.  And Bunnie wants her normal body back.  Serious.

                Looking Back

    There were a good half dozen things in this episode that never quite made sense to me.  The first of these is what Sonic and Sally were doing in Robotropolis in the first place.  The most logical reason I’ve been able to come up with is that they were there to sabotage or destroy the Shriekbot.  But that was never quite made clear.
    There was also the means of entry.  If I were in Robotnik’s place, I would have been darn sure to have several sets of sensors along the way.  And I would have made sure that there were several redundancies that couldn’t all be bypassed.  The fact that it was a sewage pipe wouldn’t have mattered.
    As far as Sonic and Sally apparantly shouting at one another, I would have thought that right there would have had them on Rocket Number Nine so fast it just wasn’t funny.  After all, even if Mobius is the kind of place where the overly abundant natural resources spontaneously generate, it would make sense for Robotnik to make use of several forms of sensors for inventory control.  In war, after all, one side is always looking for ways to hurt the other and/or gain an advantage.  In this case, one goal for the freedom fighters should be taking out or at the least seriously damaging Robotnik’s metal mines.  Meaning that even at full capacity, every scrap of metal is valuable and must be acounted for.  But I digress too far.
    With the whole roboticizer thing, I would think that if such a thing were possible, it would be fairly difficult to reverse.  But then again, two of the most famous things to come from the whole -Star Trek- phenomenon are the transporter, which is capable of converting people into energy and then rematerializing them in another location; and the Gensis Project from the movies -Star Trek II: The Wrath of Kahn- and -Star Trek III: The Search for Spock-, which was a device that created life from nothingness.  I suppose had -Sonic the Hedgehog- not been canceled on a season two cliffhanger, the problem of the impermanance of the deroboticizer might have been solved.  And the concern over the need for roboticizer parts to repair the deroboticizer is quite interesting in and of itself.  It seems to me that such a connection would be unavoidable since both serve similar functions.
    Overall, this was a good episode.  It shows a good deal of the story compression that the second season is, at least in my mind, well remembered for.  Look for my next review soon.



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