I should begin this one by apologizing to those of you who have been waiting for this. I've been busy with things offline lately and have just been forgetting. I suspect I've also forgotten something else from my FTOF series as well. I'll look into that and fix it as soon as I can. Until then, let's get down to business on this one, shall we? Italics read in Majel Barrett's voice, a la the Star Trek computer.
Last time, on JMST3K: Digidefenders Episode 5: Jesse and Leomon dress up as characters from The Red Green Show to keep from getting beaten up! The Commander sends a team of two to Japan to almost meet the Tamers! A giant Boarmon goes on a rampage in Shinjuku! And Jesse loses his glasses to Renamon in a failed attempt to impersonate Red Green!
And now, the continuation...
===================================================
[all enter theater]
[JESSE is near the center of the row. JERI is to his right, then RIKA,
RENAMON and LEOMON sitting in the aisle seat.]
>
>"'Downloading data from remote source,'" Shinji repeated. "What does that
>mean. Is >the D-4 receiving information from another place. Where?"
RIKA: Well, he's grasped some of the obvious.
JESSE: Yeah. I would think those things would be rather short range, to be
honest.
>
>------------------Digimon--------------------------------------Database-----------------------
>
>Name: War Growlmon
>Level: Ultimate
>Type: Cyborg Digimon
>Attribute: Virus
>Attack: Atomic Blaster, Radiation Blade Attack
JESSE:["Attack From Mars" voice] We must build an Atomic Blaster!
>
>Shinji: Finally found something. He's called War Growlmon. He's a
>Dinosaur covered >in metallic armor. His attacks, atomic blaster and
>radiation blade, give him the ultimate >power.
>
>----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>"I never heard of War Growlmon," Chi said.
>
>"Neither have I. But he is a Digimon. At least I think he is. He doesn't
>look like any >Digimon I've ever seen..."
RENAMON: You got information on him from a Digivice and you're not sure if
he's a Digimon?
>
>"Shinji, wait a minute. A data-class, virus-class, and vaccine-class
>Digimon. One of >each attribute. Could that mean something?"
JESSE: Vikaralamon works for I. M. Satan Co.?
RIKA: Hey now...
>
>"Not sure, but Vikaralamon must be bad if all three are standing against
>him."
>
>"But Vikaralamon's a vaccine-class. Aren't vaccine class suppose to be the
>good guys?"
JESSE:[dumb sounding] Dah...
JERI: That would make the most sense.
>
>"Still not sure, but Vikaralamon is definitely bad news for us humans."
LEOMON: Good grasp of the obvious, I'd say.
>
>Shinji and Chi ducked into an alleyway. They watched as the four Ultimate
>Digimon >went at it. There were three Ultimates against one but
>Vikaralamon seemed to have the >upper hand. Chi tried to peek outside to
>see if there was anybody else in the viscinity >but an explosion kept
>forcing her back.
RIKA: That's one persistant explosion.
>
>"What do we do, Shinji? We can't get out without getting caught up in the
>battle."
>
>"Nothing we can do except sit it out."
>
>Suddenly Vikaralamon started flickering, partially dissolving.
JESSE: Oh, OK. That's *supposed* to be happening. Thought my vision was
getting worse for a minute.
>
>"They did it!" Shinji cried. "They're beating him."
>
>"Wait a minute," Chi said. "The other three are dissolving too. Whatever
>it is that's >making Vikaralamon disappear, it's going both ways."
JESSE: You mean they're not already gone?
RENAMON: Nope, all three of us are still there. And I'm even using Talisman
Spell, just like before.
JERI: You really can't see too well without your glasses, can you, Jesse?
>
>"Chi, you're D-4." Chi looked down. The D-4 was emitting electricity,
>like it was >short-circuiting. Suddenly it started to glow. Upon
>instinct, Chi held out hers. The >D-4s began producing an energy beam.
>The energy beams covered War Growlmon, >who was helplessly pinned
>underneath one of Vikaralamon's energy sphere, in what >appeared to be some
>type of static electricity barrier, a forcefield.
JERI: Can *our* Digivices do that?
LEOMON: I'm not sure.
>
> Shinji's did likewise.
>
>"It's like our D-4s are helping War Growlmon, Rapidmon, and Taomon," Chi
>said. It's >preventing them from being dissolved the same way Vikaralamon
>is."
>
>
>
>At Headquarters, the Commander stepped up to a control panel.
>
>"Getting response from the D-4s," a technician called out. "They're
>offering reserve >power to the Digimon that are attacking Vikaralamon."
>
>"Good," the Commander replied. She was hoping the D-4s would do something
>like >this.
>
>
>
>Suddenly a tremendous earthquake began erupting. A loud screach could be
>heard, like >a monkey's scream. The D-4s blinked out. Chi and Shinji
>began covering their ears in >pain. Shinji looked around and discovered a
>dumpster.
>
JESSE: Ah. OK. So that's why he's acting like Shatner.
>"Please be empty, please be empty." To his luck, it is. "Come on, Chi,
>inside."
>
>"But it's a dumpster!"
JESSE: Funny, it doesn't *look* all that much like a toilet.
RIKA: She said *dumpster,* you fool!
>
>"Yes, you're very smart, now come on." Shinji pushed her into the dumpster
>then >climbed in himself.
>
>
>
>They must've blacked out because the next thing Shinji noticed, he was
>asleep in the dumpster.
LEOMON: The lousy bum.
>
>"Chi, wake up," he said gently shaking her awake.
>
>"Huh... wha... Shinji? What happened?"
RENAMON: Nothing, we hope.
>
>"That screach must've knocked us out."
RIKA: And once again we see Shinji's wonderful grasp of the obvious.
> Shinji and Chi
>climbed out of the dumpster and >into the street. The entire neighborhood
>was in chaos. Buildings were wrecked. There >were potholes the size of
>tanks and shattered glass everywhere. The Digimon were >nowhere to be
>seen.
JESSE: So that's not just my vision being bad...
>
>"Wow, it's like World War Eleven here," Chi commented. "Where are
>Vikaralamon >and the others?"
>
>"Maybe they... were deleted," Shinji deduced.
>
>"I hope so," Chi said. "If those four kept on battling the way they were,
>the entire city >would've been demolished." Shinji nodded.
JERI: It looks like it halready has been.
>
>Suddenly a strange energy cought their eyes. They turned just in time to
>see a shape of >1s and 0s. It looked like a huge cactus wearing a poncho
>and a sombrero.
>
>------------------Digimon--------------------------------------Database-----------------------
>
>Name: Ponchomon
>Level: Armored
>Type: Ghost Digimon
>Attribute: Virus
>Attack: Tequila Knuckle
JESSE:[singing] He's a one-eyed, four-legged, big-mouthed purple people
eater...
LEOMON: There's one you don't hear often.
>
>Ponchomon: Hu-hu-hu-hu, I'm Ponchomon, I go by my own beat and anybody who
> >doesn't like it will get a beat... from my Tequila Knuckle. Hu-hu-hu-hu.
>
>----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>"Tequila Knuckle!" Ponchomon's fist glowed with fire and he broke down a
>building.
>
>"I hope there was nobody in there," Chi said.
JESSE:[Checkov, from partally collapsed building] My God! Was anyone in
here?
LEOMON:[Scotty, from partailly collpsed building] Aye...
>
>"Come on, let's go to work."
>
>"Right. Lopmon, digimerge!"
JESSE: Hey, you know, I think Lopmon's in you guys' show, too...
JERI: She is...?!?
JESSE: I think so, but I'm not sure.
>
>"Elecmon, digimerge!"
JESSE:[hums MegaMan stage-select music]
> The two Digimon that were animated looked
>like a small brown >dog and a small red rabbit.
JESSE: Red? I thought Lopmon was *pink*...
LEOMON: Mabey it's that colorblindness thing again...
JERI: You're colorblind?
JESSE: Not technically, at least not so far as I know.
>
>------------------Digimon--------------------------------------Database-----------------------
>
>Name: Elecmon
>Level: Rookie
>Type: Mammal Digimon
JESSE: Now if ever there were a Digimon that should be a robot...
>Attribute: Data
>Attack: Super Thunder Strike, Sparkling Thunder, Body Attack
>
>Shinji: Elecmon may be small, but his thunder powers will shock you...
>literally.
>
RENAMON: Not a word, Jesse.
>
>
>Name: Lopmon
>Level: Rookie
>Type: Beast Digimon
>Attribute: Data
>Attack: Blazing Ice, Tiny Twister
>
>Chi: Lopmon may look cuddly, but he has the power of ice. His Blacing Ice
JESSE: *Blacing* Ice? Is my hearing going now, too?
>
> will not >only beat you
>back, but freeze you too.
>
>----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>"All right, guys, go get him," Shinji instructed. Lopmon spread his long
>ears and took to >the air, gliding on currents of wind. Elecmon galloped
>up to Ponchomon.
>
>"Hu-hu-hu-hu," Ponchomon laughed. "If you guys want to play, you got it.
>Tequila >Knuckle!" Ponchomon's hand became energized and he swung it at
>them.
>
>Lopmon banked and Elecmon dodged.
LEOMON: Tequilla... Isn't that an alcoholic beverage?
JESSE: Last time I checked.
>
>"Hey Elecmon, you want first crack at him?" Lopmon asked.
>
>"I thought you would never ask. Super Thunder Strike!" Elecmon emitted
>lightning >from his tail.
JESSE: Oh, oh, oh! That has got to hurt!
RENAMON: Thanks for the image, Jesse.
JESSE: Well, it's not as bad as what I could have said...
JERI: What was that?
JESSE:[straining] Piiiii.... kaaaa... chuuuuuu!!!
RIKA: Could you please smack him, Jeri?
JERI:[pounds a fist into JESSE's shoulder]
> Ponchomon absorbed it with a laugh.
RIKA: Since when did Ponchomon have refractive armor?
>
>"Looks like it's your turn," Elecmon said to Lopmon.
>
>"Blazing Ice!" Lopmon shot a blue beam at Ponchomon. Ponchomon absorbed
>it with >a "huff."
>
>"Nothing they do seems to affect him," Shinji gasped.
RENAMON:[sarcastic] My, isn't he the intelligent one?
>
>"We have to keep trying," Elecmon said.
>
>"Elecmon's right, we can't just let him trash us," Lopmon agreed.
JESSE: Well, at least she's got a positive attitude about this.
>
> The two sprang back >into action again.
>
>"Blazing Ice!"
>
>"Super Thunder Strike!" The two attacks combined and slammed Ponchomon
>back. >He quickly grabbed Elecmon. "Sparkling Thunder!" Elecmon's body
>produced a strong >source of light that temporarily blinded Ponchomon.
RIKA: And the audience.
>
> Ponchomon threw Elecmon away >and he landed in Shinji's arms.
>
>"Sorry... Shinji... I... failed." Elecmon grunted before turning back into
>a card.
>
>"Elecmon..." Shinji turned towards Chi with a serious look on his face.
>"Chi, it's all up >to you now. Give it all you got."
>
>Chi's innocent face reflected the determination in Shinji's own. "You got
>it. Lopmon, >fall back a little." Lopmon withdrew until there was about
>twenty feet separating the >two.
>
>"Lopmon, digivolve!"
JESSE: Guess who's gonna win...
>
>DIGIVOLUTION
>
>"Lopmon, digivolve to... Endigomon!" Endigomon was a large beast that
>walked on his hind legs. His head sported a strange white crown with three
>spikes in it. His face was circular at the front and he had two long green
>ears. His fur was red and black.
>
>------------------Digimon--------------------------------------Database-----------------------
>
>Name: Endigomon
>Level: Champion
>Type: Beast Man Digimon
>Attribute: Virus
>Attack: Koko Crusher, Howling Destroyer
>
>Chi: You're in for it now, when it comes to brute strength, nobody can
>match >Endigomon. His body contains a fierce weapon called the koko
>crusher
JESSE: Which crushes things into Coacoa Pebbles.
>
> and his voice >produces a scream that would
>make even ultimate-level Digimon coward in fear.
>
>-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>"Hu-hu-hu-hu," Ponchomon laughed.
>
>"I'm getting sick of that laugh," Chi said. "Endigomon, do it!" Endigomon
>moved >forward. Ponchomon moved forward too.
JESSE:[singing] Go forward; move ahead...
LEOMON: Keep that up and *I'll* whip you.
>
>"Tequila Knuckle!" With a loud roar, Endigomon fired his own punch. The
>two >punches collided producing a shockwave. Ponchomon tried to punch with
>the other >arm but Endigomon stopped it with his other hand.
>
>"Beta Slugger!" Everybody turned around. Behind Ponchomon was Rick,
>Nikolai, and >Jorge along with Betamon, Gizamon, and Gotsumon.
>
>"Endigomon, we distracted him, attack now!" Betamon called.
>
>"Endigomon jumped back. His shoulders opened up to reveal several missile
>launchers.
>
>"Koko Crusher!" The missiles fired.
JESSE: Missiles? What the...? What was the *punch*, then?
LEOMON: I don't know.
> One by one, the
>missiles hit and Ponchomon >dissolved.
>
>Endigomon dedigivolved to Lopmon and returned to his card state. The other
>Digimon >did likewise.
>
RENAMON: What was the point of the other three even being there, then?
>"Come on, let's go back to Headquarters," Rick said. "We have a lot to
>talk about."
RIKA: I'd say.
JESE: Say, Renamon. How's about you just give me my glasses back.
RENAMON: You gotta do something to get them back.
JESSE: How does a pinball match sound?
RENAMON: You're on!
[Exit theater]
=========================================================
I'd have doe the host segment that comes here, but that would have made this just a bit longer than I would like for this sort of thing. So, next time, hopefully in the next week or so, I'll have the third and final part of this MiSTing up for you all to enjoy. We'll see two host segments, one of which is amongst my all-time favorite host segments, in the "Adventures With Bill" pinball battle and the one joke in all of my MiSTings that I've managed to remember all these years without looking at it.
But that's for the next issue, folks. I'm hoping it doesn't take me another two weeks to get it up. A fortnight is a little long, I think. Until then, of course, I'll see you with more Text Playing of Legend of Mana and Final Fantasy, some free-forming, and maybe even a cat story or two. See you soon, dear readers!
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